the book that is going to change my life

how is it possible i haven't read this one yet? "my parent's keeper: adult children of the emotionally disturbed" by eva marian brown. i read page after page, highlighting sentences whenever i feel my heart scream out, "YES! THIS IS YOU!!" and there are so many to highlight. there are some issues that don't immediately apply to me, but oh my goodness.

this is the same kind of revelation i had when i first joined my "adult children of the MI" support group, which is the one and only thing i do for "myself" every month. this is life. changing. i think to digest this properly, i'm going to have to start with a thought from the book and write out my emotional responses. i feel like this is the right course.

the first one i'm mulling over is:

"over the years, as you repeatedly experience your parent's inadequacy in responding to your feelings, and as you witness their own internal chaos, you build a life around being in control. being in control becomes the most important thing in your life; your survival depends upon it."

next entry.